betheair

It's a lonely path to be the person you need to be for others when it's the opposite of who you are. He wishes there was someone he could tell but his secret is too dangerous to trust to anyone. Not because he is afraid of betrayal, but because he's getting in deeper than he ever thought possible. He's able to protect himself. He'd die to protect those important to him. But he's already seen what he's up against. And he can't be there to protect someone else at every vulnerable moment.

He wants to go to Laurel. She's always been the one person who believed in him. Even when he wasn't worthy of that trust, she was there for him. He betrayed her and got her sister killed. He knows he can't go to her. He shouldn't. But she's the one person he could go to.

He finds himself outside her window. He's been staring at it for so long his eyes start to blur. He's come this far but he can't will himself to go any closer. She's the one person who would accept his mission and who he has become. She might question his methods, but she would be who she always was: supportive and all too willing to see the good in him.

He shakes his head. It's too dangerous for her. And he doesn't deserve to be let back into her good graces. Not with what he's done. No matter how much he feels like he needs her support. With one last look, he turns and walks away. Their paths would continue to cross while he is on his crusade. Of that he has no doubt. But the extent of her involvement in his double life, that he could control and limit. He wouldn't be the cause of any more pain for her.